They would say things that hurt – and they knew what to say.
When I was in my late teens my Mum and Dad started to become very critical of each other. There were arguments and tears. They would say things that hurt – and they knew what to say.
By the time I was in my twenties, they finally separated. I remember at the time feeling like I had to fix it as I loved my parents and wanted them to be together. I tried so hard to make them look at the good things in their marriage but there was such deep unhappiness and anger on both sides. Both my Mum and Dad went to unbelievable effort to convince me that they were not to blame and the other person was in the wrong.
When I finally realised they were going to divorce, I couldn’t believe it. I felt so responsible “Why me? Why can’t I do something to help them?”
I had a very good friend who advised me to talk to a psychic who had helped her through a particularly bad situation. Through our conversations I realised that there was a future for me, whether my Mum and Dad were together or not.
My responsibility as a son was still to love my parents but not to get involved in their issues. I found the courage to tell them that I loved them both and for that reason I wouldn’t take sides. Initially my parents did not like that but over time they came to respect my decision.